Ever since we enrolled the girls in school I have been alternating between feelings of optimism and quiet panic. And varying levels of sadness.

We went to the open house and met the teachers and saw their classrooms. This made me feel better. The teachers seemed nice and I could picture the girls there. It turns out that they'll be able to order food from Subway and a local Mexican restaurant, so Lillie won't be eating peanut butter sandwiches every day.

Lillie's teacher is young and pretty. She was very calm. Lillie's class is going to start out quite slow. Letters and numbers. Which hopefully will be fun-easy and not boring-easy.

Grace's teacher seemed a little more no-nonsense (or something), but nice and likeable. The math is Saxon (what we have been doing) and is 7/6. I was worried math would be too easy, but we just finished 6/5 so this is right on schedule. The daily homework doesn't look to be too intense. If Grace gets all of her homework done during the week, she'll have an extra recess on Friday. She likes those kinds of incentives and rewards.

Both teachers said that they have other students who are (er, were) homeschoolers.

I have been feeling calmer and better about the whole thing. I can see them happy and excited and making new friends. Then, this morning I went upstairs to read the Bible before everyone woke up. When I was done, I looked around our playroom/schoolroom. I saw our timelines and our school books and our spanish corner and I just felt so sad. I love that time with my girls.

It's been odd for me, not ordering curriculum and not planning out the year, figuring out art projects and science experiments and all of that. But, it really hit me today all the hours together we won't have.

It will be alright. We'll find a new rhythm in our day. We will still be a family, we will still be together. The girls will be able to tell me about their day. They will find a new sense of independence. I don't know what else it will bring, but I hope it's good.